What is Love?
Last week I joined a group of people are talking about what is Love? Some said "Love is patient, Love is kind. It is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick tempered, it does not brood over injury. It bears all things believes all things, hopes all thing, endures all things, Love never fails... so faith, hope, love remain- these three; but the greatest of these is love."
In my head am asking my self what is really Love? is that just a memory to take with you?, we are after all just two groups of peoples as Men and Women. Most we men go to bars throw money at them and fall in love. There was no touching allowed in the bars. The men came to the bars not so much for lust as for love; the bar girls' most favored body part was their ear. They earned the men's love by listening: to their problems with their wives, their bosses; to the small and epic adventures of their metropolitan lives.
The dance girls, and the other women of the shadows, can only earn a living in a world where men and women have stopped talking to each other. They're too scared. The men, especially. Exactly how do you make a pass these days at a lady you're fond of? Do you send her a note? Do you try to kiss her? Do your hire a plane to write words of love in the sky? Does your lawyer send a letter to her lawyer? Do you pull her hair? Do you invite yourself back to her room to critique her poems? Or do you expect her to make the first move?
She might well make the first move. In cities like New York .Many American women said Their parents aren't there to introduce them to eligible young men. They have to find one themselves. But men are in an uneasy position. We can't look to our fathers for guides to how we interact with women today. We're expected to have an equal share in parenting, but the courts are stacked against men in most custody disputes. There's an epidemic in the developed countries, of children growing up without fathers. Even in the conservative Catholic country of Chile, for example, 60% of the babies born last year were born out of wedlock. Somehow the west has convinced itself that fathers are dispensable.
When these feminists talk of women in developing countries, they often view them as victims. Well, the fact is that India has twice elected female prime ministers, while the US has yet to elect even a vice president who's a woman. In matters political, at least, India has done something right in the 60 years since independence. In a country which is 82% Hindu, we have a Sikh prime minister, a Muslim president, and an Italian Catholic widow as leader of the governing coalition. Not only are the peoples of all nations one family, they are all invited to rule India. So Indians have a right to wonder: who the hell are these Westerners, to preach to us about how we should treat our minorities or women?
Most Indian women have the love of extended families, and are far more comfortable with fathers and brothers than most of the women I've seen elsewhere. Indian women like their men. They even love some of them. And if a man expresses interest in them, they know how to handle it; they know how to say no and they know how to say yes.
understanding of each other, which is complex and subtle, and time-tested. Otherwise there wouldn't be more than one billion. Unlike the advanced countries, Indians have no problems making babies; Indian population pyramid is very broad at the bottom.
Perhaps, This is the culture that has sustained the world's oldest continuing civilization; there must be something of real value, to both women and men, for it to have lasted so long. I am thinking of the marriage of my grandparents and parents, both 'arranged' marriages. They were very happy what they had although not quite 'equal' in the western sense. My grandfather has to work and my grandmother stayed at home and raised six children. As was the custom, not once, in their lifetime, did they say out loud each others' names, but they had no problems talking to each other; shouting, whispering, cajoling, threatening, pleading, singing. They never needed to step out of their roles; they never felt any need to stop becoming man and woman. My grandmother loved my grandfather not in spite, but *because* he was a man, and she liked taking care of him. She knew what he wanted to eat before he even realized he was hungry for it. When my grandfather passed away, in his eighties, my grandmother had no more wish to remain on earth. "Your grand pa is waiting for me," She kept saying, and followed him.
Could such a marriage work in today's India? Or in America? I doubt it. We have to establish a new paradigm, a new way for men and women not just to be each with each other in a lifetime's union, but just to observe the everyday courtesies. No modern woman has time to serve her man three meals a day, as my grandmother did; she rightfully expects that he will serve her at least one of them.
We will also never understand men and women until we understand the hypnotic power of lust, and its role in furthering the human species. We seek out different people for different needs: sex, companionship, money, good breeding stock. All over the world, there is a giant overthrowing of taboos. There is a giant choosing. Never in the history of the world have so many people chosen their own love: old, young; richer, poorer; taller, shorter; love for a day or love for a lifetime; love of all different races, castes, creeds. There is a gigantic experiment underway in the human race, a gigantic cross-pollination.
A 4 years old Kid expressed " the Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day. Here we are talking about Men and women Love, how do you express your love?................
In my head am asking my self what is really Love? is that just a memory to take with you?, we are after all just two groups of peoples as Men and Women. Most we men go to bars throw money at them and fall in love. There was no touching allowed in the bars. The men came to the bars not so much for lust as for love; the bar girls' most favored body part was their ear. They earned the men's love by listening: to their problems with their wives, their bosses; to the small and epic adventures of their metropolitan lives.
The dance girls, and the other women of the shadows, can only earn a living in a world where men and women have stopped talking to each other. They're too scared. The men, especially. Exactly how do you make a pass these days at a lady you're fond of? Do you send her a note? Do you try to kiss her? Do your hire a plane to write words of love in the sky? Does your lawyer send a letter to her lawyer? Do you pull her hair? Do you invite yourself back to her room to critique her poems? Or do you expect her to make the first move?
She might well make the first move. In cities like New York .Many American women said Their parents aren't there to introduce them to eligible young men. They have to find one themselves. But men are in an uneasy position. We can't look to our fathers for guides to how we interact with women today. We're expected to have an equal share in parenting, but the courts are stacked against men in most custody disputes. There's an epidemic in the developed countries, of children growing up without fathers. Even in the conservative Catholic country of Chile, for example, 60% of the babies born last year were born out of wedlock. Somehow the west has convinced itself that fathers are dispensable.
When these feminists talk of women in developing countries, they often view them as victims. Well, the fact is that India has twice elected female prime ministers, while the US has yet to elect even a vice president who's a woman. In matters political, at least, India has done something right in the 60 years since independence. In a country which is 82% Hindu, we have a Sikh prime minister, a Muslim president, and an Italian Catholic widow as leader of the governing coalition. Not only are the peoples of all nations one family, they are all invited to rule India. So Indians have a right to wonder: who the hell are these Westerners, to preach to us about how we should treat our minorities or women?
Most Indian women have the love of extended families, and are far more comfortable with fathers and brothers than most of the women I've seen elsewhere. Indian women like their men. They even love some of them. And if a man expresses interest in them, they know how to handle it; they know how to say no and they know how to say yes.
understanding of each other, which is complex and subtle, and time-tested. Otherwise there wouldn't be more than one billion. Unlike the advanced countries, Indians have no problems making babies; Indian population pyramid is very broad at the bottom.
Perhaps, This is the culture that has sustained the world's oldest continuing civilization; there must be something of real value, to both women and men, for it to have lasted so long. I am thinking of the marriage of my grandparents and parents, both 'arranged' marriages. They were very happy what they had although not quite 'equal' in the western sense. My grandfather has to work and my grandmother stayed at home and raised six children. As was the custom, not once, in their lifetime, did they say out loud each others' names, but they had no problems talking to each other; shouting, whispering, cajoling, threatening, pleading, singing. They never needed to step out of their roles; they never felt any need to stop becoming man and woman. My grandmother loved my grandfather not in spite, but *because* he was a man, and she liked taking care of him. She knew what he wanted to eat before he even realized he was hungry for it. When my grandfather passed away, in his eighties, my grandmother had no more wish to remain on earth. "Your grand pa is waiting for me," She kept saying, and followed him.
Could such a marriage work in today's India? Or in America? I doubt it. We have to establish a new paradigm, a new way for men and women not just to be each with each other in a lifetime's union, but just to observe the everyday courtesies. No modern woman has time to serve her man three meals a day, as my grandmother did; she rightfully expects that he will serve her at least one of them.
We will also never understand men and women until we understand the hypnotic power of lust, and its role in furthering the human species. We seek out different people for different needs: sex, companionship, money, good breeding stock. All over the world, there is a giant overthrowing of taboos. There is a giant choosing. Never in the history of the world have so many people chosen their own love: old, young; richer, poorer; taller, shorter; love for a day or love for a lifetime; love of all different races, castes, creeds. There is a gigantic experiment underway in the human race, a gigantic cross-pollination.
A 4 years old Kid expressed " the Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day. Here we are talking about Men and women Love, how do you express your love?................
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